life is good. not just because of this moment.

great summer nights are just reminders of how awesome life is,
for me it takes that conversation where everything kind of falls into place, even if some things fall into a not-so-great place... so much is said about all a person can know. I just need that sometimes. And i just gotta thank god for people like rachael; not just a supporter, but a real believer. and when i say believer, i dont really mean it with any religious context. We're all just human beings who eat drink and pee, but somewhere along this path of survival, we went from beings that communicated to get food and drink, to using language to bridge the gap between souls.

that sounds crazy, but really... when you experience that, it's very true. I feel it in music all the time. just some kind of connection whether its through the bass, or the drums, or the lyrics, where i feel as if me and the creator of this music are exactly the same.

we're gonna be seniors. I used to look up to the older kids. They always seemed so cool without trying to be, and when i was a freshmen i had to try to be cool without even really realizing it. so now i'm on the other side. And i think most of that look of the older kids being "cool" is just the fact that people start to become comfortable with who they are, and you can sense personality around certain people. Sometimes that type of thing comes with age (and experiences), anything to make you more sure of who you are, what you like, what you don't like (not just what "everyone" likes or doesnt like). And the whole friends thing, and being popular or whatever, its not worth it to aim for popularity, or to aim for having friends. It's so much more worth it to find who you are, and know who your friends are, and to have some that really understand or really just fit. I used to think I was too different from everyone to really have some great true friends. But it seems one or two.. or three can really make all the other ones seem just as important.

Thats when you know you have something real. I believe theres lots of truth out there, just waiting for us to see it. And other people show it to us, by being there and being really honest. so don't ever give up your part in the story. don't ever completely become something other than what's at the core. Sure, experiment, find the firm footing after slipping a few times, but never leave behind the truth, your dreams, your hope, your honesty. Cause it's really all we have in the end. The truth about ourselves and about the world, in a language we created to explain something beautiful and complex.

it's the struggle that matters, the journey is the destination, foward march damnit, get somewhere, do something, and love every minute of it, cause when you stop to soak it up, it's usually not even there anymore.

life is amazing. i'm so greatful for the people i love. and i hope that statement doesn't sound exclusive. each person i know is beautiful in so many ways. and i hope all of them can see at least one way. and live like they're comfortable with it. cause that's important. I'm getting there. and i see all this, and i'm thankful, but more thankful that there's always more to see.