do not be intimidated by who you are.

This phrase is what has stirred itself up in me ever since watching the documentary "The Journey," over at Rach's a couple nights ago. It was about a guy taking his friends on a hippy bus across the country not sure what he was going to do, but ended up setting up interviews with influential people and asked them questions and video taped it all. He asked questions like, what advice do you have for young people.. and "what are you struggling with today" and for the people who opened up, it was just so interesting.

A big message in the movie is to do what your instincts drive you to do... to actually try to do something great, and then if you don't do it, it will still be so worthwhile, you can't regret something you tried to do that was good, because the whole process is so important, of actually doing things we believe in.


i was thinking while listening to a CD of what our songwriters group recorded (each person in this highschool songwriters group recorded songs on their own, sent them in, and we made a little compilation CD). Well when i'm driving my mind sometimes thinks up conversations with people, in which i think up responses and keep going. so i heard the vocals to a song and thought, the EQ could be changed here... even if you're going for a natural sound that isn't processed digitally, what you have has already been processed according to the mic, and so you choosing not to change it doesn't change the fact that it's already changed! Okay... I know not everyone thinks about microphones, but to draw that example to a larger setting... who we are has already been constructed to an extent. The life we know (sticking with the metaphor) is heard through the sound system of our familes and our upbringings. Now is when we choose the hard stuff... we can either continue going with the key elements that make up our sound/our essence... or we can take the damn thing apart and make it better. The weird thought is, we don't gain everything from our family. We gain so much from so many different places.. I mean there's school/college, work, sports, music, coffee houses, books, friends, mean people... the list goes on.


I guess what i'm saying in the title of my blog is that we learn from our experiences, and those are not limited to where we've been in the past.

it's really intimidating to look at this future PACKED with action and things that I've never done before, and to not be there yet, and to have a choice to go. And i'm choosing to go, but it's still so complicated. I'm not sure if there's any sort of prep-work before the challenge, or if it's just something to get thrown into. Right now I'm about to get thrown into exactly where I need to be (portland, OR) and it's going to be different than anywhere I've been before. Sink or Swim. And if you swim, its a big old ocean. This will be hard! It will be great also, but it will be hard. sheesh. What to do in the meantime? making art is nice... take a look at what came out of "art day" (me and rach making art on her back deck):







Above we have... the set up, Rach painting her beautiful glass vase, and my painted/collaged wooden piece.. sorry bout the glare. it's nice to be able to make art... not to impress, but to express. especially when its so hard to put my finger on some words.. hence the words on the wooden painted board- "when words alone fail" and the black hole of mystery/fear behind it, and the colors of hope around it. it's something i can look at. or create.

I feel like reading a book. Not sure which one yet. suggestions are welcome.

Jodi